June 4, Dating Game

Short Games

1. Take yourself out.
2. Treat yourself to a dinner and a movie.
3. Walk yourself home.
4. Stand in front of the mirror.
5. Lean in for the kiss.
6. Stop at the last second and back off
7. Go to bed alone.
8. Cry yourself to sleep.
9. Send a text to yourself saying:
Last night was great, but I don’t think this will work out.
10. Score yourself based on what you text back.

May 13, Orchid Game

Short Games
1. Take a deep breath.
2. Let the smell travel through your nose and down
into your sooty and clogged up heart.
3. Wave your flower at passers-by.
4. Speak to no one and nothing but your flower for a month.
5. Chop it up and pour poison on it.
6. Keep it in a jar under your bed until the next full moon.
7. Bury it in your backyard.
8. Dig it up when you’re ready to lose for real.

April 17, Flaneur Game

Short Games

1. Get up out of bed, it’s 6 pm, dammit!
2. Eat something.
No, not leftover snacks.
What the hell?
3. Put on socks, for chrissake.
This should not take much longer than 10-15 minutes.
4. Put on underwear, seriously.
This should not take much longer than 10-15 minutes.
5. Put on a t-shirt, no one wants to see that.
This should not take much longer than 10-15 minutes.
6. Put on pants, Donald Duck.
This should not take much longer than 10-15 minutes.
7. Put on a sweater, because it’s cold.
This should not take much longer than 10-15 minutes.
8. Put on a jacket, and make it quick(ish)
This should not take much longer than 10-15 minutes.
9. Spend maybe 25-30 minutes looking for music, podcasts, lectures, ambient field recordings, or political speeches to listen to while you walk.
10. Step outside and notice that the sun is down, it’s raining, and you have not got the time nor energy for this shit.
11. Go back inside.
12. You lose,

you loser.

April 13, Superstition Game

Short Games

1. Visit an acquaintance who’s sick and in need of care.
2. Place their bed north and south, not cross ways.
3. Tie a bunch of mint around their wrists.
4. Put a piece of bacon on their forehead
(IF the bacon is cooked as a result of this,
it’s alright for you to eat it).
5. Sing your four favorite songs to put them to sleep.
6. Walk around their bed backwards seven times,
gathering all their valuables as you go.
7. Keep walking backwards,
rood eht tuo,
eht nwod
iats
sr
,
bac ixat a otni.
8. Tell the cab driver to keep the change.

March 31, Honey Game

Short Games

1. Drip from the ceiling for at least a day
(never mind who put you there,
or what their reasons were).
2. Stick to the floor, bed, carpets, walls, and mirrors
for as long as possible.
3. Remove the apartment from your body and leave.
4. Get on a bus, or a train, or an airplane, or a time machine
(whichever is closest).
6. Play a crucial part in every major revolution
of the 21st, 48th, or 2nd century.
7. Forget how to speak if you really need to.
8. Fly a plane into me whenever you’re ready.
9. Achievement unlocked: Loss Flight.

February 19, Painter Game

Short Games

1. Trace the outline of your chin with a shovel.
2. Get a bucket of ice.
3. Paint a train station pink.
4. Paint a hospital black (all of it — black beds; black sheets; black journals; black televisions; black floors; black ceiling-mounted speakers; black wheelchairs; black IV tubes; black windows; black kitchenette; black doors; black lung diseases; black broken ribs and punctured lungs; black hearts; black feet; black eyes; black sores; black bruises; black nurses and doctors; black visitors and patients; black cab drivers and ambulance medics; black bibles; black knives and sharp needles; black hopes; black despair; black cancer; black MS; black alcoholism; black delusions; black depression; black surgery; black ulcers; black fractures and splinters; black head trauma; black stab wounds; black cardiac arrests; black pills; black liquid medicine; black band aids; black chairs; black bandages; black disinfectants; black tourniquets; black flash bulbs; black laundry; black breakfast, lunch and dinner; black stethoscopes, black hopes)
5. Forge your own signature and use it to buy a house.
6. Paint the house red.
7. Paint the house blue.
8. Trace the outline of your heart with a black needle.
9. Swallow the needle.
10. Ask someone who has lived more than you to score you based on your performance.

January 23, Relaxing Game

Short Games

1. Find a comfortable bed or chair to lie in.
2. Close your eyes and take a deep breath.
3. Remember: this game is dependent on
your own willingness to submit to its rules.
4. Focus on the sound of my voice,
…even though I’m not actually talking.
5. Don’t focus on yesterday or tomorrow.
6. Don’t focus on things you tried,
but failed to do.
7. Don’t focus on things you wish you did,
but were too scared to try.
8. Feel your heart getting heavier.
9. Wish for sleep. Eternal sleep.
10. Rest until fully healed.